Retro Puppet Master

Quentin

oh god!..make it stop!..it's horrible...horrible!..are those actors?!..i won't believe those are actors!..it's too gruesome to bear!...it's the most horrible movie i've ever seen!..is that a film crew guy?..or somebody's cousin?..i was told there'd be puppets!..there aren't any puppets!..for the love of god make it stop!..

Ben

I need to preface this with a couple of points: first, that I have not seen any of the previous Puppet Master movies; and, second, that there were times where I wanted to just stop the video.

As far as I can tell, Retro Puppet Master is a prequel to a B horror movie, with much less of a budget than its original. There are all sorts of holes and anachronisms, and the acting is mediocre to horrible. Oh, and the fake accents make me shudder.

The only reason I can think of to watch this is if you are a highly dedicated fan of the franchise; there isn't even enough laughable material to make it worthwhile.

Remember, I watched it so that you don't have to.

When The Party's Over

Quentin

I've never heard of this movie before, have you? It's very nineties, but I like it, I've watched it twice, which is saying something, compared to most of the other videos we've found, in the dumpster. The main character is a #$@%!& monster (in the human sense of the word), she's horribly manipulative and self serving. I think I like hating her, that is; I hate her, and I think I like to. Anyway, I've got a very strange and confusing clip I'm going to exploit the movie with, even though I enjoyed it. I'm using it mostly cause I like Fisher Stevens, but I'll explain that in a later post.

Ben

So, looking at the cover of this movie made me think that Sandra Bullock would be playing the lead role. I mean, her face is the background on the front, the logo on the sides, and she's shown in all the group shots. As you may guess, she's not the main character. While one could argue for equal footing, the main character is probably M.J..

M.J. is a manipulative, egocentric monster who screws up the life of all her friends and housemates. It's doubtful she even changes at the end, but that's not the point. This movie is more a snapshot of a group of young housemates, each trying to find their own way in the world.

I didn't really think the movie was going to be very good, but it surprised me. While it does seem to caricature the issues young adults face, I think it's realistic in the way it handles them. Rae Dawn Chong plays the selfish bitch well, and Fisher Stevens is fun to watch in his role as Alexander Midnight, Amanda's (Bullock) boyfriend.

This movie likes juxtaposition. There's one scene where a 'birth' is placed up against a death, and contrasts with an earlier rape, which is in turn placed among a couple of love scenes. All I could think about, though, was the movie "She's All That", where, in one scene, Freddie Prinze, Jr. pulls out this on-the-fly performance art piece with a hacky sack, which everyone in that movie loves, but is really the stupidest thing. Of course, seeing Fisher Stevens coming out from between a giant pair of legs and screaming his head off like a newborn comes across as kind of stupid, but is more entertaining, and definitely more believable as performance art.

All Dogs Go To Heaven

Quentin

I absolutely love this movie, I've watched it a few times since I dug it out of the dumpster. I wish I could've seen it when I was a kid, however, my friend says she's kinda screwed up 'cause she grew up watching it. Not sure why.
Don Bluth (the Director) is a genius, he adds a certain darkness that Disney is too afraid to try. Anyway, watch this clip about a big gay crocodile, and keep in mind it's not an accurate representation of the film as a whole.

Ben

Charlie the dog loves the fast life, but when he escapes prison (the pound) and returns to his business partner, who just happens to be the one who framed him, his partner decides to try more permanent measures.

When Charlie finds himself in heaven, it doesn't quite match up to his idea of the good life, so he steals the watch which kept him ticking, winds it, and plummets back to earth with a voice following him, saying, "you can never come back."

Add to Charlie a little girl, Anne-Marie, who can talk to animals; a best friend, Itchy, who can't stop itching whenever trouble comes around; a big gay alligator; a few musical numbers for seasoning; toss it in the oven, and out pops a cartoon classic.

Dom DeLuise and Burt Reynolds have worked well in plenty of live action movies, but I'm not quite sure the chemistry carries over well into animation. DeLuise does a good job as a voice actor, going on to do plenty more in his career. Reynolds' voice doesn't quite work, his success relying on a physical presence, but who can forget a duet between a rough around the edges dog and a big gay creole alligator?

There's a charm to these Bluth classics, from the older storytelling, and from the hand-drawn animation. I hope to find more.